The Student Leader Blog

Shifting my own perceptions - or - A funny thing happened to me on Twitter the other day

As a student worker and leader, I have come to realize that many of the faculty and staff at my community college seem to operate as if making work easier for themselves will lead to a better learning environment for students. This thought began to grow out of a tweet I saw by SA blogger Kevin Prentis. While I don’t remember the exact wording it was something like, “schools ask ‘how has this been done before’ 5-6 steps [or so] prior to asking ‘how will this impact students.’” I have seen this approach while revamping our club/organization's handbook and in the development of a web portal for students, faculty and staff. I take this statement to represent the assumption that their most important “problem” to solve, or goal to reach is smooth implementation of policy and procedure - from an administrative standpoint. While working to make things easier for the “end-users” of a project and taking stress off of faculty and staff is a great thing (something I would gladly cheer for) I don’t think there is a direct correlation between an easier day at the office and a better learning experience for students.

Sometimes streamlining doesn’t really assist processes and can take the focus off of the students. Pounding my head against a wall of paperwork and trying to follow expectations that have been passed down can get in the way of affecting constructive change or simply doing something fun. When students feel ways of doing things are not necessary and try to get around the system, I have seen their efforts viewed as challenges to authority. Directors and coordinators step in with a firm assertion of their roles and, though they listen to student’s reasoning it seems half hearted at times. I feel lucky that my supervisors say that they are working for students and I’ve seen them act upon their convictions, but there have been times when I feel my ideas have gotten stifled or dismissed for no better reason than “that’s not how we/others do/have done things.”

While I get frustrated with this answer and its outcomes, I try to look at most challenges as a learning experience. “What’s the lesson” has become a sort of mantra when frustrated or unsure how to continue. When I am shot down, seemingly out of hand I have to dig a little deeper. I try to find an answer if for nothing more than my own piece of mind. Many times I come to the conclusion that I might not have expressed myself clearly, or I am unaware of all the influences surrounding an issue. Politics certainly exist in any large group of people and school systems are often great examples of aggressive human interaction. I have to realize that some issues concerning me might not really be about me at all, a sort of hard pill to swallow. I also think that many times I overestimate my own understanding of an issue. I can miss the point entirely and become so wrapped up in the frustration of a situation that I fail to recognize the knot of emotions impeding my own thought process.

One basic assumption that all of this searching has brought me to is kind of complex; the people I work for, who profess to be ultimately working for me, do have the basic motivation of helping students. They feel their goals will ultimately benefit students. This is their motivation for seeking change or standing in the way of changes they disagree with. So maybe the statement that Kevin made has some more background to it that I may have overlooked when reacting to the truncated nature of the tweet. If we trust that our administrators are in fact working to makes school a more productive place for students, they probably ask themselves how will this benefit students many times each day. So when I look at the steps taken in a certain project, I might not fully appreciate all the steps involved. I still think it’s a shame there isn’t necessarily an open discussion about the impact on students before people consider the impact to their work, legal considerations, etc., but I am also guilty of the same thought process.

Maybe my first question should be a deeper “why” when looking into my inability to create change. I might have more success if I don’t assume resistance to my ideas is caused by belligerent adherence to "the way things are." Our education system certainly needs new ideas and a lot of changes in perception, but my being shot down doesn’t automatically mean my supervisors are opposed to change for the better, regardless of my own convictions. Maybe they are teaching me how to make changes that will aid a bigger picture that I might not have enough experience to fully appreciate; they may be teaching me how to make changes that last rather than changes that just make my life easier. Of course this assumes that administrators really are looking out for students. There are individuals that only look out for their paychecks and professional standing, but I have to admit I’ve found (in my limited experience) that this is the exception rather than the rule.

The Point of Happiness

I'm teaching a class on happiness tomorrow and the thought of it is telling my brain that it's 3PM instead of the 3AM that it really is. I'm awake. I'm very much awake, and I'm trembling all over. My couch is covered in books, my notepad is full of scribbles, and up until I sat down to write this post, I couldn't stop pacing around the apartment. My cats got tired of watching me and fell asleep.

I don't know if happiness is something one can teach and, even if it is, whether I can teach it. I don't know whether this class will have any impact on anyone or anything aside from my sleep cycle, but it seems that there's a possibility that it may, and so long as that possibility exists I need to take it very seriously.

Why? What's the point of this class? What's the point of happiness?

The simplest answer is that it feels good. In the book A Primer in Positive Psychology (the best textbook ever written), Chris Peterson points out that happiness has also been shown to predict things like long lasting relationships, financial success, and physical health. But what makes it so God damn important in my eyes is the realization that you can either live a life bursting with joy and radiance or you can live your life as though it's a homework assignment. An entire life cherished, or an entire life simply, spent. You only have one teeny life, and how you live it depends entirely on your perspective.

When I think of the point of happiness, I also think of the point at which my own perspective shifted forever. It was in high school, and I had been depressed for over a year, maybe a lot longer. Then in one instant, I suddenly snapped out of it. I don't know exactly what did it (though I'm sure the antidepressants helped), but suddenly I was exuberant, and I'll never forget the contrast between those two mental states: like lying under a pile of bricks one moment and then floating up on a cloud of balloons in the next. Being mentally present for that transition taught me how to recreate that feeling voluntarily, but more importantly, it taught me that life can feel terrible, it can feel like nothing much, or it can feel wonderful. And if it can be wonderful, why not work to make it wonderful?

Feeling wonderful makes us want to do wonderful things - to create, to build, to nurture, to solve, to take risks, and to make others feel wonderful. And that's the point; isn't it?

How paying attention can change your life.

One of my students wrote a post on our class blog that reminded me why paying attention can change everything.

She said that the 5 minutes of class for which she was fully conscious (thanks) led her to reconnect with two friends she otherwise would have given up on. That's one friendship rebuilt per 2.5 minutes of paying attention. She writes: "What would have happened if I hadn't attended class at all? I shudder to that thought."

This line of thinking makes my head explode with infinite configurations of could'ves-would'ves. What if I hadn't overhead that there was an advertising club in my high school? Then I would not have connected with a video company I went on to work for (on and off) for six years. I almost certainly wouldn't be teaching video research to middle school kids now. I probably wouldn't have met my boyfriend (since we met because of my camera), and we wouldn't have two fuzzy little cats and an apartment together.

What if I didn't look at the flyer someone handed me about a student leadership retreat at Hunter? Then I would not be teaching first year seminar (because the idea came up in one of our conversations), and I wouldn't be writing this post right now.

So much of life stems from just a handful of occurances.

Obviously, we can't pay attention to everything all the time, but imagine if we all paid just a little more attention. Maybe a few extra minutes would lead you to that one new idea, new relationship, or new opportunity that will determine where you'll be 10 years from now.

I hope you've been paying attention to this blog post :)

How to stay clean when the bureaucracy gets dirty.

I had a really nice talk with Hunter's dean of student life the other day - somehow, even with all his responsibilities, he always finds the time to just talk. And that is at the heart of this blog post.

He's worked at Hunter for 39 years now, and he always gets to his office before 6AM. He attends every student play and drives up to Hunter's leadership retreat in upstate New York just to thank everyone for coming. He meets thousands of new students every semester and remembers their names. He answers students' email on Sundays. He is one of the few administrators at Hunter College whom everyone respects and appreciates.

I joked with him about the beast of bureaucracy, and he told me a great Eisenhower story that summarizes it pretty well. Apparently, when President Eisenhower decided to leave his position as president of Columbia University and run for president of the United States, he said he did it because he wanted to get out of politics. Yeah...

When I asked the dean how he managed to maintain his identity and passion in the bureaucracy, he said that for him it has just been a matter of honesty and integrity. If you ask him a question he will answer it, and the values behind his answers will always be consistent.

I like that answer. I like it a lot. It means that perhaps the way to win in the game of politics is by refusing to play or perhaps by playing only by your own rules.

If I die tomorrow, will I regret studying for the GRE?

Got home, kicked off the high heels that I shouldn't have been wearing, plopped down on the couch, opened my calendar. Calendar says "study for GRE." But here I am writing a blog post and not studying, and I'm trying to figure out whether I'm doing the "right" thing.

Today a friend said something along the lines of: "how can I waste time worrying if I might die tomorrow?" I think about this a lot, particularly as a way to calm myself down and get some perspective on life. Perspective seems to be one of the first things to go under stress. (Hint: You know it's happening to you when you get a B- on a test and you start contemplating suicide).

I've gotten pretty good at cutting unnecessary stress from my life, but now I'm thinking in terms of "what if I die tomorrow" as far as studying for the GRE is concerned -- and all other activities that lead to short term frustration and long term benefits.

I have a hard time reconciling the values of "plan ahead" and "seize the day." As a student leader, I was constantly trying to figure that out how to choose between the slow and bloody battle with bureaucracy vs a short and sweet goal that makes people (and me) happy tomorrow but doesn't amount to much in the end.
I suppose we have to live with the understanding that sure, we might die tomorrow, but we also might not, and plan accordingly for either outcome. It's safest to assume you're going to be around for a long, long time, but use the reminder of mortality to make sure you're doing your best to enjoy every moment. At the end of the day, I think it's possible to be both ready for tomorrow, and feel no regrets about the way you spent the time you've had, should your time run out.

So I'll go study for the damn GRE in case I'm still alive on Saturday, but I will also pour myself a hot cup of tea (because tea makes me happy) and try to find some intrinsic motivation for relearning geometry. As for whether or not it was right for me to take the time to write this post... I don't know, but I don't think I will regret it.

How to improve your self control in 4 steps

Over the past few months, I've been working with a friend of mine as her "life coach." We organize her home, discuss productivity blocks, develop organization systems, and other similarly fun stuff. I don't claim to be qualified, but at least I don't seem to be doing any damage.

This week, our focus is supposed to be on self control because my friend pretty much has none.

Hah! I say to myself. I can teach self control! Just then I notice that I'm feeling a bit nauseous. I look down and realize that I've just eaten about 3/4th of my left over birthday cake. It was an entire cake. I also notice that I'm tired. Perhaps it's because I just wanted 6 episodes straight of The Wire, but that's just a guess. Okay, maybe I'm less qualified than I suspected.

After this realization, I decided to do some research and some brainstorming on this subject. I've just started down this path, so forgive me if I stumble, but here are 4 steps for developing self control that just might work:

1. (a) Make a list of area in which you exhibit good self control and/or particular situations in which you felt you had a lot of self control.
(b) Write down what you were thinking and feeling or what you generally think and feel in these instances; how do you get control over your actions? Why do you think you have control in this area and not others?
(c) Write down how you feel about yourself when you practice self control and what its positive consequences have been.

2. (a) Make a list of the areas where you lack self control (e.g. eating, arguing, procrastination, poor prioritization).
(b) Write down your thoughts and feelings (especially rationalizations) at these times and try to find the flaws in the reasoning that leads you to "give in."
(c) Write down how you feel about yourself when you exhibit poor self control and its negative consequences.
(d) Compare this list to item 1.

3. Make a list of positive alternatives to your usual poorly controlled actions (e.g. eat a carrot or celery stick when you see a brownie lying on the table, turn to your to do list when you are about to start wasting time on line, instead of replying to a Facebook message right now, set a Facebook/email/text message date for yourself (set an alarm on your phone) and do it at a more appropriate time, turn off the light at a particular time at night even if you don't feel sleepy).

4. Review these lists on a regular basis and add to them as you learn more about your self control. Get to know your strengths and weaknesses (especially your rationalizations) so that you can catch yourself in time.

As I said, this is a new path for me, so forgive me if I stumble. I'll keep you posted on the efficacy of this advice as I try it out on myself. Your suggestions and confessions are encouraged :)

P.S. Must. Not. Go. Back. For. More. Cake.

Student and Faculty First Impressions and the Pathetic Attempts our Brains Make to Judge Others

I love realizing how flimsy first impressions are. Like most other humans, my brain goes into automatic stereotyping / snap-judgement mode when I'm in a new environment around new people. The fun part is that I don't take any of it seriously. I kind of just sit back and smirk at how simple-minded that simple portion of my brain is as it tells me stuff like, "That dude's rude," "That chick's materialistic," and so on and so forth. Within a few days or weeks, I almost invariably find out that there's much more to each of those people than meets the eye, and the simpleton part of my brain blushes profusely and retreats to its primitive lare.

On my first day of teaching (August 27th), my primitive brain immediately told me that all of my students were shy, quiet, and/or bored. Of course, what I'm already starting to realize is that most of them were only 20% shy/quiet/bored and about 80% freaked out because it was their first day of college. By the second week of class, my freezer of a classroom was already mostly defrosted, and I am very much looking forward to see what next week will bring.

Yesterday, I also had the unexpectedly moving experience of reading the first few posts by a few of my students on our class blog. Their writing (about their first day of class) was so eloquent and so completely honest that I get goosebumps each time I think back to it. I couldn't believe how introspective they were and how willing they were to share such private experiences. Seeing their thoughts written out like that (fears, anticipation, excitement, hesitation) really reinforced my belief in how pathetic our judgment ability really is -- I was expecting a lot from my students, but they've already managed to surpass my expectations.  Is anyone actually a good judge of character (in the first hour or so of interacting with a person) or do we universally suck at it?

4 Hour Work Week for Student Leaders??

I've been reading a nifty little book called 4 Hour Work Week, written by a modern-day Renaissance man named Tim Ferris, who claims to work 4 hours per week while dancing tango, practicing martial arts, and learning new languages all over the world. Though student leadership isn't the best source of funding for our dream vacations, Tim's advice can seriously cut down the amount of time we spend doing whatever it is that we do so that we can purse other ventures or bigger dreams of student leadership:

Here's a quickie overview of some of his most relevant suggestions:

- Check email only twice per day (once around noon and again around 4pm).
- Get people that know more than you to summarize what they know so that you don't have to learn it (e.g. ask your group member to show you how to fill out a form instead of spending time figuring it out).
- Have at least one important goal every day and complete it in the morning, BEFORE checking email.
- Following the 80/20 rule, figure out which 20% of you actions contributes to 80% of your useful output and cut out the rest. In other words, do only the things that are useful.
- Shorten your deadlines (because work expands to fill time). Give yourself and others less time to do something than seems reasonable. This gets people moving, focused, and often produces better work. For example, I gave myself 10 minutes to write this post, and it does a better job of getting right to the point than a lot of my other writing.
- Delegate like crazy: give everything that you don't absolutely need to do to your group members, and give them decision making authority so that you don't slow down their work.
- Have fun... wait no that was Randy Pausch's advice, but I really like it.

P.S. 1 minute left to spare!

It's not in my job description, and that's that.

I'm taking an Industrial Organizational Psychology course this summer, and recently, we covered the topic of job descriptions--a subject I've thought a lot about since development of job descriptions was added to my job description at my former job. (You may need to re-read that a few times before it starts making sense).

Anywho, during the class, my instructor was adamant about the fact that a worker must never say "it's not in my job description" to a superior. If your manager tells you to do it, then do it. Otherwise, you come across as unmotivated, lazy, arrogant, or all of the above. I can understand the merit of this advice, but in my experience (as leader and worker), this kind of ready-and-willing compliance also has a dark side.

A former coworker of mine actually lost his job in part because he was constantly agreeing to do things outside his job description. He accepted random tasks as his main responsibilities sat waiting, and he eventually lost credibility in the eyes of his supervisor--all as a result of being too eager to please.

As a worker, to prevent this from happening, I've learned a handy managing up strategy: saying "Okay, sounds good, but here are the things that I am working on right now. Which of these items should I push down in order of priority so that I could take care of what you're asking me to do?" This reminds the leader of your role and its importance while showing your willingness to do what ever needs to be done--as long as it's really a priority.

As a leader, I've made the mistake of asking members of my group to do things outside of their roles and later kicked myself for doing it because (a) I had delegated the task to people who weren't the best fit for it and (b) they completed this task at the expense of their priorities (i.e. the stuff in their "job" descriptions). And I also risked (c) making them feel unappreciated or overworked. All very bad juju. A leader has to respect people's roles and only ask for them to step outside these roles if it really makes sense to do so and with an appropriate explanation of the request, and then adequate appreciation. And that's how you get good juju.

How to Prioritize (when your to-do list is taller than you are)

I think we've evolved to be doers, but not necessarily doers of the right thing at the right time. Now this obviously sucks. We find ourselves constantly working on something or other, spending piles of time and energy, and at the end of the day, there is no time to do that one super-important-gosh-I-meant-to-do-that-first thing. Though I am still plagued by this very modern ailment of scattered attention and procrastination, there have been a few things I've been able to do to get myself and my groups to be more productive.

BIG PICTURE PRIORITIZATION   

First and foremost, I keep in mind Steven Covey's wonderful, wonderful time management matrix from Seven Habits of Highly Effective People (which I HIGHLY recommend):

The way Covey puts it, our activities fall into 4 quadrants: (1) Urgent and Important (like deadlines, pressing problems, and medical emergencies), (2) Not Urgent and Important (like planning, studying, preparation, starting projects with deadlines early, relationship building, and exercise), (3) Urgent and Not Important (like many meetings and deadlines for things that won't really make a difference in your life), and (4) Not Urgent and Not Important (like busywork and time wasters).

The sad truth is that we tend to spend the bulk of our time in quadrants 1, 3, and 4, and hardly ever visit quadrant 2. But ignoring 2 makes 1 fill up with more and more pressing and stressful items, making us feel overwhelmed.

The solution: get your quadrant 1 items out of the way (staying out of quadrant 4), then focus on quadrant 2. The more you do so, the less items you have in the nasty quadrant 1 and the better you feel. Tadda!

FINE-TUNED PRIORITIZATION

Now that you're in the right quadrant, you still have to figure out which item goes first. My technique is taking a few minutes to rate each one (from 1- 5) based on:

- How close the deadline is
- How much time it will take
- How close I am to having all the necessary resources to complete it
- How good it will be if I do it
- How bad it will be if I don't do it

The bigger the sum of the ratings is, the higher the chances are that you'd better get started like right now... I need to go right that paper for my class now, don't I?