Got home, kicked off the high heels that I shouldn't have been wearing, plopped down on the couch, opened my calendar. Calendar says "study for GRE." But here I am writing a blog post and not studying, and I'm trying to figure out whether I'm doing the "right" thing.
Today a friend said something along the lines of: "how can I waste time worrying if I might die tomorrow?" I think about this a lot, particularly as a way to calm myself down and get some perspective on life. Perspective seems to be one of the first things to go under stress. (Hint: You know it's happening to you when you get a B- on a test and you start contemplating suicide).
I've gotten pretty good at cutting unnecessary stress from my life, but now I'm thinking in terms of "what if I die tomorrow" as far as studying for the GRE is concerned -- and all other activities that lead to short term frustration and long term benefits.
I have a hard time reconciling the values of "plan ahead" and "seize the day." As a student leader, I was constantly trying to figure that out how to choose between the slow and bloody battle with bureaucracy vs a short and sweet goal that makes people (and me) happy tomorrow but doesn't amount to much in the end. 
I suppose we have to live with the understanding that sure, we might die tomorrow, but we also might not, and plan accordingly for either outcome. It's safest to assume you're going to be around for a long, long time, but use the reminder of mortality to make sure you're doing your best to enjoy every moment. At the end of the day, I think it's possible to be both ready for tomorrow, and feel no regrets about the way you spent the time you've had, should your time run out.
So I'll go study for the damn GRE in case I'm still alive on Saturday, but I will also pour myself a hot cup of tea (because tea makes me happy) and try to find some intrinsic motivation for relearning geometry. As for whether or not it was right for me to take the time to write this post... I don't know, but I don't think I will regret it.
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