Making New Friends

Whether you are a business student whose career is  largely driven by "networking", an activist whose  demonstrations depend on "grassroots organizing" or any type of student in between, the ability to connect with others is an integral part of being a leader. There is no better place to work with  people of diverse backgrounds who are willing to learn and challenge themselves, than on a university campus. Creating a genuine connection with another person is always exciting, if not electric. Having more genuine friends expands the breadth of ideas and paradigms you come across, expedites project completion, ensures more attendance at events, effectively "shrinks" your campus, and provides a community of support as you lead your respective groups.

Freshmen year I was neighbors with an Afghan student with a large heart for his community, a student from Mexico who made the All American Men's Soccer team as a freshmen, and a black student with incredible business savvy who hailed from the part of Los Angeles that tourists don't visit. Those were only three of my six neighbors, on a floor of one hundred students. There were nearly one hundred such floors within a square acre on my campus. Yet many students would say, "I  haven't met many interesting people,  I can't relate to anyone here."  There is no reason to ever utter those words, whether at a bus stop, outside of a Starbucks, or even in a convalescent home. It is your responsibility to be confident, genuine, curious, give choices, and offer assistance.

There are many variables that affect interactions, small things that determine whether someone is deemed "smooth", or given the label of "awkward". However, I have found connecting to be extremely simple, enjoyable and rewarding beyond anything else I've ever done.

I have had the opportunity to take part in many classes and seminars regarding connecting, have read a large number of bestsellers regarding the intricacies of networking, and most importantly have made it a point to implement the tips and strategies on my own campus. I look forward to sharing my insights in future posts. The first five posts will expand upon areas that I have found to be integral when developing new friendships: self confidence, coming from a genuine place, curiosity, giving choices, and offering assistance.

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Comments

[Tania]

These are all really good points. The thing that always holds me back in the friend-making field though is the time commitment. Friendship takes time and energy, and it's always been difficult for me to figure out how to manage it. Is there a secret to this? If so, I hope you can write about it at some point!

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